Time to give up.
Yes everybody it's the start of Lent, 40 days and 40 nights in which Christians traditionally fast and give to charity. Being brought up in an increasingly secular country means that Lent is more of a cultural traditon than a rule. Shrove Tuesday is still a day where most families make pancakes, and people still give up some unhealthy activity or donate money or time to a charity over Lent.
Being in Japan didn't stop me from eating pancakes on Tuesday. I introduced this British tradition to Melissa and Carrie last year and was happy to snack together again last night. The pancakes did look more American than British, but lemon and sugar still worked as my favourite topping. Anyway, pancakes aside, Lent has begun and it's time to give up something. I'm giving up a range of things this year, but the most important thing is worrying. I worry all too much these days. I don't know where this bad habit has come from (mum!) but it's useless, time consuming and annoying.
Unfortunatly I've found giving up worrying to be very difficult so far. Does anyone have any hints or tips on how to kill off my worry bugs?
I don't want to write the story!
The sun is shining down on Kamigoto for the first time since winter hit in December and I feel happier already. I'm sure I'm being lulled into a false sense of security and soon icy temperatures will return. My JTE and I discussed global warming in the car today (spurred by the sudden return of warmer weather) and he informed me that the major increase in CO2 output in Japan was linked to people using to many plastic bags, and that Japanese industry had actually decreased their Co2 output. I persued the conversation further by trying to find out whether the increase in C02 output from rubbish was related to Japan growing as a consumer society. Even if a relation did exist, it doesn't explain why CO2 output would increase so much over a short period, and I questioned whether Japan's Industrial Co2 output included the companies working abroad, polluting elsewhere. My questions remain unanswered.
I have to be honest and admit that the main reason I'm writing today is because I don't want to write the stupid story I have to write for work. It's quite difficult having to squeeze 170 different grammar points into an interesting story for my 3rd grade students to use as a review. Frankly, I need a break, and I was due a rambling blog entry anyway.
January was much as I expected it to be, cold and slightly depressing. It contained good news and bad news. Bad news was that I was refused my transfer for Nagasaki. If I move there this August then I'll be starting a new job. The prospect is daunting and I'm exceptionally nervous as I'll be in a new job, new area with most of my close friends (if not all of them) moving on to new things and different countries. I do really want to stay in Japan though, there are still things I want to study and living in city (even a small city) will give me access to conferences, workshops and new experiences. Everything happens for a reason.
Good news is that I'll be visiting home this summer, for maybe 3 weeks. I hope to catch up with everyone that I haven't seen for so long. I'm both nervous and excited. As much as Japan has become a home, I've been dreaming of home far more since November, I think I need to see my family and friends. Things have improved on the work front too. Last April I got a new JTE at my other Junior High School. He's exceptionally strict with the kids, I'm scared of him. the students can only raise their right hand to answer a question, and they have to always know the answer. This method does ensure the kids have their homework done and the answers right (the alternative is an extreme telling off) it doesn't give much room for me. I, the smiling happy 'English is fun' ALT, can only stand to the side of the board looking serious (bored) about English and occasionally read out words for the students to repeat. At first I wasn't even being taken to class. Recently, I'd decided I'd had enough. I hated being dragged to class in the cold when all I was doing was worth 5-10 minutes of the lesson. I can't help or advise the students, or intervene in the class. I spoke to another teacher, and she spoke to the deputy head. From February 1st I've been given my own period, I teach by myself with the support of the homeroom teacher. I've taught three classes so far and the response has been great. I'm so much happier at work and the kids seem to be enjoying the lesson. I wish I'd asked sooner but at least I've acted now. Now that I know I'll be leaving in six months I have to make to most of my time here and do everything I can.
I better get back to this story though.
